The Revelation
by Rudbeck
Summary: Regina contemplates her life since Emma's arrival in Storybrooke including their adventures and how her life can change if she's willing to face her fear and tell Emma of her feelings. Emma makes an appearance but mostly Regina's POV. Not really T except for some kissing.


**A/N**  
A one shot.  
Just borrowing the characters.

Regina's POV

**The Revelation**

Regina steps off her horse and with a gentle pat on his neck sends him off to quietly graze in the meadow. She turns and rests her hand on the bark of an old oak tree. Her eyes roam over the surface scarred from the remnants of branches from long ago as her fingers trace the dark, burnt scar from an intense lightning strike. She smiles at the various peaceful sounds that surround her.

"If anyone had ever told me that I would be comparing myself to an oak tree, I would have sent them to the dungeons without a thought. But now I can understand. We've both have been through wars. Yours with winds, storms and lightning. Mine with… well really with just about everyone who either wanted something from me or just wanted me dead. And truthfully that meant almost everyone including on the rare occasion, me"

She leans against the tree, her arms crossed over her chest in a motion designed to keep her demons, insecurities and fears at bay. "You and I are survivors and we have the scars to prove it. Though no one ever wanted to see my scars because then that would have meant that I was human, that I could feel, that I was like…them. No, all they could see was the Evil Queen and truthfully, and for the longest time, that was all I could see."

Her eyes close in thought. "Placing all the blame on Rumplestiltskin is the cowards way. Yes, he gave me the curse and he encouraged me to seek my revenge on Snow and then to enact the curse. Yes, he played on my emotions towards both Snow and my mother. But it was my choice to seek revenge, it was my choice to enact the curse, it was my choice to hurt everyone whether by my own hand or by my orders. The one thing I couldn't seem to do was to actually kill Snow and there were numerous opportunities to do so."

Her eyes snap open, "That imp planned well. He cast a spell to keep me from ever successfully exacting my revenge and I wouldn't be surprised if he made it possible for Charming to find Snow after she took a bite of the apple. He needed to make sure that I was properly motivated to eventually cast the curse." Her laughter starts as a soft chuckle and then grows in intensity as it echoes across the meadow.

"He may have the ability of second sight but recent events have proved that what he sees is subject to interpretation. Pan being his father and Zelena's arrival are proof that not even the Dark One knows all. And then there's Emma."

Her hand returns to the lightning scar. "Her arrival, like the lightning that left this scar was out of the blue and in the beginning so very destructive for both of us. And yet there was an intangible connection, other than Henry, that seemed to grow with every encounter. She scared me in the beginning since she was destined to break the curse. Even after discovering that Henry's fairy tale book was real she defended me from the mob, that had ever right to demand my blood, she helped save me from the wraith as well as from her parents. And then there was her rescue of me from Greg and Tamara."

She wipes away the tears that are gently sliding down her cheeks. "She has no idea how the simple belief that she would find me keep me from succumbing to the darkness that called to me every time Greg and Tamara used their machine. How ironic that it would be two puppets of an enemy that wasn't even an enemy of mine that almost brought about the destruction of the Evil Queen."

Her eyes close as she takes a few cleansing breaths and tries to keep the memories of everything she had endured at the hands of Greg and Tamara from overwhelming her. "They forced me to confront myself and what I truly desired in my life," a mirthless chuckle is heard before she continues, "…if I survived. Yes I wanted to see Henry grow up and yes I wanted to live. I came to see that that's not all I wanted but I was scared to take the chance. And so I kept my true feelings hidden behind scathing remarks and contempt towards everyone as I had done previously."

Regina takes a few steps away from the tree. "And yet it didn't work as well as I had hoped. Especially as we had to spend so much time together during our Neverland adventure. When she left with Henry, I almost crossed the line and went with them. It took every ounce of will power I had not to run after them before the curse hit. I could say that I'm not sure exactly why I choose to stay but that would be a lie. I knew exactly why I stayed…It was fear. How ironic that the Evil Queen, who had instilled so much fear in others, was riddled with her own fear."

She takes a deep breath. "I should have thanked Zelena for forcing me to concentrate on her and not the emptiness that was swirling within me. Maleficent was right when she said enacting the curse would create a void but she was wrong about never being able to fill it. Henry started the healing process and Emma increased the speed but I hesitated in letting it be completed." She looks at her hand and slowly opens it. "All I had to do was reach out and take my happiness and I did the opposite. I let myself believe that Robin was everything I was looking for due to his Lion tattoo. And he did distract me for a while and yet the yearning for her never went away. In fact it increased and I jumped for joy when Emma brought Marian back into Robin's life. I had to act devastated since for all intents and purposes my happy ending had been taken away when actually it was the exact opposite."

A few drops of rain splatter on her shoulder. She closers her eyes and leans her head back allowing the droplets of rain to act as a cleanser. "I wanted to jump for joy, I want to run to her and thank her for barging into my life. I wanted to tell her that my heart that had been so battered, so bruised and so unfeeling was bursting with life and feeling because of her. I wanted to tell her that my soul, that had been shattered into a million pieces, was repairing itself because of her."

A softly whispered, "You did the same for me." has Regina spinning around in shock to find Emma standing near the oak tree. A reverent, "Emma," is all that Regina can whisper.

"Do you know why I stayed other than for Henry?"

Regina tries to answer but nothing happens so she simply shakes her head no.

"You see I had the same void within me. Obviously not from casting a curse."

"Obviously."

"But still it was there. And Henry did start to fill the void but you were the main catalyst. Everything we've been through, the mine, the curse breaking, the wraith," Emma snarls out, "Your mother."

Emma begins to walk towards Regina, "And everything else. You're not the only one that was fearful of reaching out and taking their happiness. When I couldn't find you after Hook helped Greg and Tamara kidnap you, I forced myself to go to Gold and ask for his help. If that hadn't worked, I was ready to tear this town apart until I found you and anyone, and I mean anyone, that had hurt you was going to learn the true meaning of pain."

"Emma, no. I never wanted you…" Emma's finger on Regina's lips stops the flow of words. "I know you would never have wanted me to darken my heart out of revenge. I simply wanted you to know how I felt while they had you." She lowers her hand to gently grasp Regina's hand and raises it to her lips where she places the softest of kisses on the soft skin. A gasp is all Regina can muster as her hand is placed over Emma's heart. "Can you feel my heart?"

"Yes." Regina glances at her hand resting over Emma's heart and quickly raises her gaze when the cadence of said heart begins to beat faster.

Emma takes Regina's other hand and places it in the middle of her chest. Then Emma places her hands on Regina in the same places. "You're not the only one that has a battered and bruised heart nor a soul that has been badly damaged. Some wonder how I let you be around Henry or even work with you because of the curse. It's very simple, without the curse I wouldn't be who I am. Yes, there were a lot of bad times and pain but without the curse I wouldn't have Henry or you. In fact the next time I see Gold, I'm going to thank him for creating the curse."

Laughter erupts from Regina, "I so want to be there to see his reaction."

"Or maybe snap a picture." Both women break into laughter at the thought of Gold's reaction.

Regina's thumb begins a gentle caress over Emma's heart. Her other hand slides up until her fingers are cradling Emma's jaw while her thumb strokes her lips. "I want to let my heart feel everything it's been denied. I want my soul to continue to heal and I want to be with you…if you want that."

Emma's lips curl into the biggest smile Regina has ever seen. Her hand grasps Regina's and places a kiss on the palm but never breaking their eye contact. "I want everything you're willing to give. I want the snarky side, the sassy side and the loving side and everything in-between. And I don't care what anyone has to say. I'm tired of my parents and everyone else trying to run my life."

"What about an Evil Queen?"

Emma tips her head to onside in thought, "Nope. No Evil Queen's but if Regina Mills is applying for the job, then yes she will have a major say in my life."

"Indeed. This won't be easy?"

"Since when has anything we've done been easy?

The smile that lights up Regina's face in a way that she has never seen. Her lips curl upward, but not as a smirk. Her eyes are soft and sparkling though there is a hint of fear in their depths. "Then I'm ready."

"For what?"

"To be happy. "

"So am I."

Lips hesitate then close the distance meeting in the gentlest of kisses. The time for all consuming kisses will come later for the time now is for softness, learning and most of all healing.

As hands begin a slow and tender caress of each others body, a gentle cleansing rain begins to fall on the two women who have been through brutal battles that have left them battered, bruised but never completely broken. Two women that thought that happiness was something they would never have. Two women who have refused to break and by doing so finally found what they never knew they were looking for, each other.

**The End**


End file.
